Roisin O’R. sent in a great example of the heteronormativity pervasive in Valentine’s Day marketing. These “dark chocolate dippers” are designed to be dipped into hot milk and melted into hot chocolate. Seeing them at a UK health food store, Roisin noticed that they came packaged in boy-girl sets:
She sent a note to the company and asked why they don’t just sell the sticks individually so that the product would be open to gay and lesbian couples (and, for that matter, polyamorous relationships or people who just want to include their kids or grandma). Roisin writes that the company said that:
…they were “following the market” and if I knew of any stores that would want “his n his or hers n hers” to let them know. They missed my point.
Sometimes it’s the little things that make people feel excluded, invisible, unimportant, or unwelcome.
For more examples of heteronormativity, see our posts on sea monkeys and more, cell phones for kids, and signing up for Trillian. Also see our post destabilizing heteronormativity with birdies!
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Lisa Wade is a professor of sociology at Occidental College. You can follow her on Twitter and Facebook.
Comments 38
justvisiting — February 14, 2010
If you're looking to for-profit businesses and the marketplace in general to make you feel included, visible, important, and welcome, you're in for a lifetime of disappointment.
Their job is to sell a product. Making you feel wonderful and whole is the responsibility of you and your friends & loved ones.
eshamlin — February 14, 2010
People are feeling unwanted because some chocolate dippers come paired as male & female?
SereniT03 — February 15, 2010
just want to note that I appreciated the inclusion of the term poly! The three of us are always a little bummed to see twos of EVERYTHING relationshippy and cute. Of course it is to be expected, but someday, maybe we will all be able to pick the chocolates that fit us best. ;-)
mercurianferret — February 15, 2010
But also notice that the company didn't say, "Absolutely not." Admittedly, it could have done better market research to see if it could sell in predominantly places that are not "heteronormative", but (from the very short clip of their response) they didn't seem to be against the idea of making a profit in other places.
Could they just sell them individually? Probably, but it might become cost-prohibitive, and therefore not worth it. This is, though, speculation, since I obviously don't know the cost structure the company is working under, and am merely making a reasoned guess.
KarenS — February 15, 2010
I'm single. No hot chocolate for me until I get with the Noah's ark thing, I guess!
Brit — February 18, 2010
I feel that these images surrounding valentines day, as well as the overwhelming amount of heteronormativity produced, packaged and shipped to Americans every day via the media, reinforces butch/femme roles in lesbian relationships. I know lots of butch women, or femme women, that purchase these heteronormative objects and see themselves in the likeness of the "man" and the "woman" in the heterosexual relationship. Do you agree that this can be damaging?
candytree — August 8, 2010
so why punish heterosexuals for their lifestyle? seriously, i think it would be very discriminatory to just get rid of it because one group doesnt approve.
Dr. Freud — February 14, 2011
It's all about numbers. In the game of Capitalism, majority rules.