In “The Yellow Fever Pages” (full citation below), Karen Eng discusses a recurring problem she, as a Chinese-American woman, faces when dating: that many men, particularly White men, who express interest in her are not interested in her as an individual, but rather in a generalized Asian woman and the fantasies that are associated with them. Eng sums up the fantasies many men hold about Asian (particularly Japanese) women:
The fantasy Asian is intelligent yet pliable, mysterious yet ornamental…perpetually pre-pubescent–ageless and petite…high-pitched, girly–while simultaneously being exotic and wise…She comes from a culture where women traditionally serve men… (p. 68).
Thus, when men ask her out, Eng has to figure out whether they are asking her out because they think she specifically is interesting, or whether they’re asking her out because what they see is an Asian woman to whom they attach all kinds of expectations about exoticism, subservience, and so on. As she puts it, regardless of how she presents herself, the interests she expresses, the type of music and clothing she’s interested in, “…they still see a little Oriental flower.”
I could not help but think of Eng’s article when one of my students, Casandra L., let me know about the dating website ClassyAsianLadies:
The website specifically markets Asian American women to men in the U.S., drawing on all of the stereotypes Eng describes. Here are some images from the site; I highlighted some of the most blatant examples of the “Asian women as hot but also passive” stereotypes in red:
So they aren’t trying to use you to get to the U.S. (though, after stating these are women living in the U.S., they are always described as Asian, not Asian American). And the men who want to date them just love and respect “the Asian culture” (and, you know, there’s just one culture in all of Asia). And how do you show your appreciation for a culture? By marrying someone who personifies the elements of that culture you have romanticized.
Notice the guys using the site appear to expect quite a lot in a woman: she has to remain “a lady,” be “sweet, gentle, beautiful, loving, fun,” but also be “intelligent and independent.”
I don’t know to what degree the website specifically targets White men. There were three photos of Asian women with men on the site; two showed Asian women with White men, one showed an Asian woman with an Asian man.
In case you aren’t convinced yet, here’s some more information on why you should marry an Asian woman:
Unlike “the average woman” (which presumably means White women in the U.S., since we’re the majority of women and all), Asian women haven’t become too competitive (just intelligent and independent! But that’s different!) and certainly aren’t “masculine.” Again we see the romanticizing of a certain stereotype of “Asian culture,” with Asian women having a “well-known cultural attitude of gentle and caring support” and “Eastern values,” which apparently involves being sweet and supportive. Though they’ve also “learned Western values,” which here is associated with being “outgoing…independent and fun…”. Thus, the West = independent, fun women, while the East = supportive, submissive ones.
Notice the last line in that image: “…that perfect Asian girlfriend or wife.” This is what Eng was getting at: this isn’t about finding the perfect girlfriend or wife; this is about a fantasy of the perfect Asian girlfriend/wife. “Yellow fever” refers to the fetishization of Asian women by men who have a specific idea of what Asian women are like and view them as particularly desirable mates based not on their unique personalities but because of the “Eastern values” they supposedly adhere to. The women thus become somewhat interchangeable. Eng’s frustration grew largely out of the difficulty of getting men to notice her, as opposed to her status as an Asian American woman.
Some other gems:
Asian women are exotic but also make a lot of money (no gold-diggers here!). Men find them “intoxicating.” They’re loyal, and “dedicated to their men.” An Asian woman “always thinks of her man first!” They’ll help with financial planning without being “intrusive”–that is, they’ll make suggestions, but it’s ultimately up to him to decide and she’ll accept whatever he decides on.
They’re “easy to be with…rarely complain…and constructive with their criticism.” One of my students said the whole “Wonderfully easy to be with” section made her think of the way people describe breeds of dogs: “Get a Labrador! They’re smart, fun, and easy-going! They’ll make a nice addition to any family!”
The translation to all of this: Asian women will offer their wisdom and support, but will then step back and let their men decide. They aren’t bitches who will nag at you or criticize you in a nasty way, or complain that you aren’t doing half the housework, or expect to have an equal role in financial decisions. And she won’t let herself go and become a fatty, so be assured–what you see now is what you can expect she’ll stay like forever.
Aside from the objectification of Asian women (and “the Asian culture”) as having a predetermined set of characteristics you can count on, this says a lot about concerns surrounding changes in gender roles in the U.S. These women are being marketed as the antithesis of the “average” woman in the U.S., who is demanding, hard to get along with, too competitive, and doesn’t stay sufficiently attractive. Female assertiveness or insistence on gender equality is de-feminizing and unattractive; it turns us into masculinized women who won’t submit to men’s authority to take our ideas into consideration but make final decisions based on what they think is best.
For a certain group of men, then, dating an Asian woman is a way to reclaim a romanticized gender hierarchy in which women mix cultural elements associated with the “East” and the “West.” They’re independent and make money (the fun part of female empowerment, unless the independence goes to far and they get uppity), but they retain “Eastern” gender roles in which their independence is, ultimately, limited by their passivity and submissiveness to men, as well as appropriate displays of femininity (being thin, beautiful, and exotic). And, thus, this type of relationship allows men who believe they have been victimized and emasculated by the women’s movement to reclaim some of the overt patriarchal power the believe they’ve been robbed of.
NEW! (Mar. ’10): Rachel K. sent a link to this t-shirt, which ThinkGeek says translates as “now accepting applications for Japanese girlfriends.” It’s a great example of the fetishization of Japanese women:
(“The Yellow Fever Pages.” 2000. Bitch issue 12, p. 68-73.)
Also check out Lisa’s post on marketing Asian women to specifically anti-feminist men.
NEW! (May ’10): Sophie L. sent in this spam message she got on Skype, offering “a sweet lady that will be caring and understanding” in case ” European and American women are too arrogant for you.” In this case the source of of these nice, lovely women is Russia…which, yes, is part of Europe, but don’t get caught up on geographical details. You can find yourself a woman with “royal blood and royal look”!
Comments 124
Deaf Indian Muslim Anarchist — March 3, 2010
Unbelievably offensive, racist, sexist, and disgusting.
Last night, a white male friend from college texted me to ask me if I can send him a naked picture of myself so he can masturbate. I said no and he texted back, "but I love masturbating to Indian women!"
I wanted to punch his fucking face.
Simone — March 3, 2010
Oh my God what is this I don't even...
I would add something intelligent, but I think Gwen's analysis pretty much covered it. All I can say is, this is some f*cked up sh*t.
Eve — March 3, 2010
I always wonder how in the heck they get women to sign up for these sites. If they are already successful and independent, what do they stand to get out of it? Do they just want a date?
I'm not judging a woman's choice to sign up for this site; I just wonder how that works.
steps — March 3, 2010
It takes an awful lot of...interesting life experiences...to be the person who is sitting at her computer (according to the website, Yan Wang is the woman who runs the site), coming up with that kind of copy--especially since the writer herself appears to be an Asian woman.
KarenS — March 3, 2010
Ewwwww ewwwww ewwwwww! "Exotic beauty and sensitive nature" sounds like they're describing a Korat kitten, not a woman.
Maitri — March 3, 2010
After a few months of dating a white guy, he said, "You're witty, beautiful and I found you here in America. I didn't even have to go to an Indian village with 40 goats in tow." So glad I left that asshole behind.
Tadjio — March 3, 2010
I had a coworker a year or two ago, who was a completely lovely Thai woman in her mid-30s. She had to positively beat the men away with a stick (we worked in a high-traffic spa so we saw a lot of people on a daily basis.) One evening the began complaining to me about these older, white men who just would not leave her alone.
I told her that white men have this romantic idea of Asian women as being demure-yet-sexy little "Yes my Master" types towards their men. Her eyes grew enormous and she absolutely burst out laughing. "That's how we are in PUBLIC!" she explained, amazed that anyone had actually "bought" what she thought of as an act. "But in private -- " she pantomimed grabbing everything within arm's reach and hurling it across the room at an imaginary husband.
Same woman also knew judo. I wouldn't have messed with her.
I can't say that my friends group is a good representation of Asian women as a whole, but of the Asian women I know (Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean, Thai) they seem just as swift as American women to rip you a new one if you cross them. If you talk to Asian men (most of my guy friends are Chinese), many of them seem somewhat cowed by women of their own culture, for exactly the reasons that white men are supposed to be turned off from "Western" women -- they cite Asian women as being too "controlling", too "demanding", etc.
I think this whole "exotic flower" notion is a pervasive myth about Asian women -- which is perpetuated, I'm sure, by a sort of cultural precedent in Asian countries as well as in America. But it doesn't matter if the Asian "ideal woman" is one of these quiet/shy/subservient types; from what I've seen your average Asian woman only mimics this stereotype, and then only in public venues.
(Also, anecdotally I've spoken to several men who claimed that a Korean ex-girlfriend would come at them swinging during an argument. I don't know how common this is in the population as a whole, but I've heard several stories to this effect.)
nijireiki — March 3, 2010
Dude. In the first highlighted box I got so angry that I heard Christian Bale's voice cursing out at the screenshot from within my mind. That's... never happened to me before. The Christian Bale thing, not the rage.
Then it basically turned into the Revolucian BaleOut mix from there.
Sounds like these guys need to meet some of my tough Hmong friends from out in the Midwest. It's a lot harder to fetishize someone as "gentle and loving" and "think[ing] of [you] first" when they're kicking your ass.
Lynn — March 3, 2010
"One of my students said the whole “Wonderfully easy to be with” section made her think of the way people describe breeds of dogs"
That was exactly what came to my mind as well. Yuck.
splack — March 3, 2010
"Asian culture"? Oh lord. It is hard to believe an Asian woman created the site. And as a white woman, I cannot even fathom the shit Asian women have to put up with daily. The closest I can come to understanding is when I had blonde hair -- men would act as if I was walking around in a bikini, sucking a lollipop. Craziness.
It's also interesting how this site pits women against each other, at least for the benefit of the (presumed) male audience.
Jack — March 3, 2010
I want to know what is different about this site, that isn't the same on every other dating site.
What I see here is men and women who have a desire to find a mate, it's not our business what other people find attractive, or not attractive. I don't see any laws being broken, and everyone seems to be of their own free will in viewing this site.
I remember my sister coming home with a guy who was a surfer back in the 70's and we thought he was a total pot smoking looser, he turned out to be a really nice guy who treated my sister great. My point is that we all have our likes, and dislikes and it's not our place to tell anyone who they should date, or be attracted to. If these "adults" like each other, isn't that enough for us to respect their decision even if we don't agree?
By the way, I don't see anyone saying they would prefer we all go to some other dating site, maybe there is an issue here with dating sites in general?
David Marjanović — March 3, 2010
Sickening. They're selling a product. Is that normal for dating sites...?
Plebius — March 3, 2010
I completely agree with very nearly everything said, and the site is pretty trash.
One thing I do take offense to is the implication that wanting a wife who does not behave masculine is somehow sexist. I'm fine with women behaving in any way they wish, just like men usually may do. However, don't complain if I do not find it sexually attractive because it evokes the image of a man in my mind.
I am attracted to females because they are not men.
Again, if a woman wishes to behave like a man, she may. I just don't find such women sexually attractive. I suspect a great many men feel the same way.
And before someone complains about me labeling certain behaviors as "masculine" and "feminine," I'd like to clarify that throughout this thread I am working with the scheme that men have more testosterone than women and aggressive behavior is linked with higher testosterone levels.
I welcome calm debate, because if you can present a good argument against what I've said, I will change my mind. I am reasonable, and do not perceive anything offensive in what I've posted. I think everything I typed is grounded in biology (if a bit broad-stroked).
Margo — March 3, 2010
This satire site might interest some of you.
http://www.bigbadchinesemama.com/
Sean — March 3, 2010
Wow. I am so happy to be a black man! I gotta tell you I see that stuff all the time. Same for all women. And some men too. "Dashing romantic Latino will burn yoru soul with their Latin heat." "Strong black men with their 11 inches of nubian manhood" Try asking and looking around what other stereotypes come into play with dating someone that isn't a white american?
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[...] The Submissive Asian Stereotype: Classy Asian Ladies Dating Site ... [...]
Andrew — March 4, 2010
I visited the site, trying to figure out where they get this stable of "classy Asian ladies." Is it equal-opportunity, with women voluntarily signing up as members in hopes of finding a partner who idealizes their perceived ethnicity? Can non-Asian women join? LGBT people? Is there some kind of screening process for verifying that a member is, indeed, of the "high quality" advertised? And how do they make money?
Well, reading the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy didn't answer any of those questions. I learned that they intend to collect bank/credit details and Social Security numbers, but there's never any sign of what services they charged for. Aside from a bold disclaimer that they don't do criminal background checks, there's not the slightest indication that members are filtered to ensure "sincerity" in men or "femininity" in women.
So I pressed on ahead and made a fake membership - as a "big n' lovely" bisexual woman named Ginger. Oddly enough, I was never asked whether I was Asian, or classy. In fact, signing up took less than one minute and required no personal details at all - not even a verification of my email address. A broad member search revealed that there were 4 faceless members to choose from within 100 miles of San Francisco (which has its share of Asian-Americans). Registering again as a 30 y/o male, I got a slightly better catchment - 16 members, 3 of which had actual profiles with photos of Asian women (plus one of a dog), and text that seemed to have been written by the same person as the site's own ads.
And then, THEN...well, sorry, no big scandal to report, I just got bored. Truly hoped I'd uncover the secret prostitution scam or something like that, but it seemed like you'd have to start writing to people before the supposed swindle caught on and the cards came out of the wallet. As far as I could tell, someone just snagged a catchy domain name, parked some really generic dating-site protocol and a cut-and-paste contract onto it, and sexed it up with a completely inaccurate pitch about all the work they're doing to form relationships and bring special embodiments of dumb stereotypes together in gender-specific bliss. There are thousands of websites like this around the world - probably new ones every day. I doubt they deserve consideration as a serious cultural influence; if your email has a good spam filter you'll probably never encounter them.
But props to Karen and Gwen for analyzing the stereotypes that the site reinforces, even if it is a bit of nutpicking. I wouldn't consider it in the same light as personals/matchmaking sites that people actually use.
links for 2010-03-04 « Embololalia — March 4, 2010
[...] The Submissive Asian Stereotype: Classy Asian Ladies Dating Site Aside from the objectification of Asian women (and “the Asian culture”) as having a predetermined set of characteristics you can count on, this says a lot about concerns surrounding changes in gender roles in the U.S. These women are being marketed as the antithesis of the “average” woman in the U.S., who is demanding, hard to get along with, too competitive, and doesn’t stay sufficiently attractive. Female assertiveness or insistence on gender equality is de-feminizing and unattractive; it turns us into masculinized women who won’t submit to men’s authority to take our ideas into consideration but make final decisions based on what they think is best. (tags: asian-americans stereotypes gender intersectionality dating) [...]
Richard Jeffrey Newman — March 4, 2010
Hi All--
New reader here, and I am enjoying the blog. I realize that the original post and the comments here are focusing mostly on East and South Asian women, but some of what people have been saying has made me think of my experience being married to a woman from Iran. This comment by Tadjio really resonated with me:
When I first got married, a colleague of mine who fancied herself quite radical in her feminism and other politics, said, in my wife's presence anc clearly referring to me, "Isn't it a shame when American men need to find wives from countries where the women are submissive because they can't deal with strong American women?" I was not present, but I trust that the person who told me about it--who was not my wife--represented my colleague's words accurately. I thought about this for a long time and I finally decided that what my colleague was doing--since my wife was (and is) anything but submissive--was confusing a culture of service and deference (in other words the performance of cultural norms) with an internalized sense of true subservience.
People reading this also might be interested in this essay, which I wrote about some of my experiences when I lived in Seoul in 1988-89.
Liz B from DC — March 4, 2010
ICK! This reads like a purebred dog breeder's webpage. Women are NOT COMMODITIES.
Aion — March 4, 2010
I'm sorry but the constant harping on this issue is mildly disheartening. This is my favorite blog though, so it's ok :-).
I hear far less about the issue of what's happening in terms of "femininity" in Asia, where women are using skin bleach to look like white women do to the global impact of white female supremacy... More interestingly, the topic of black men who chose (and have always claimed) that they prefer white women because they are "more feminine" than masculine/strong black women is a very similar issue. I'd prefer to see white women more actively discussing how THEY themselves are fetishized and preferred due to the feminine construct in whiteness. But white feminists are DEAD SILENT about this issue in general. Do white women feel this insecurity about their color the way asian women (and myself as a black woman) are made to feel when men declare a preference for us? Or are they confident/validated enough in the construct of whiteness to realize that they are and should be everyone's first choice?
On the one hand, I do see yellow fever as an extremely important issue, and on the other, this screams of being a threat to white female beauty privilege. It is NORMAL for men all over the world to decide and declare a preference for white women because they are more "naturally feminine" and a fetish when white men state a preference for women who are not white? I've never heard the word "fetish" apply to the men of color who trip over themselves to date white women because they are decidedly more feminine either.
So yeah, it is very interesting. That many white women and feminists can agree that the "yellow fever" issue needs further "investigation" without imagining how they may be threatened because they've always been the sole beneficiaries of the "heightened femininity" argument due simply to whiteness.
-A-ion
Jenn — March 4, 2010
This reminds me of a trend that was interesting in my high school. I went a school that had interesting racial dynamics. Most of the students were either White or Asian... about evenly split. A really common phenomenon was that -- come time for school dances -- quite a lot of the senior and junior White guys would show up to dances with freshman Asian girls on their arms. It was never the louder Asian girls either (such as my best friend at the time, who was known as a black belt and the captain of the Speech and Debate team), just the ones that did school projects with music from Pocahontas (yes, really), never cursed, and spoke softly or not at all. Some of them were even younger than 14, due to skipping grades. Quite a few of the White boys loved that crap: the more immature the girl, the better.
I actually remained friends with a lot of those girls after high school, even though we weren't close in high school (I had a reputation as a bitch, and "good girls" tended to avoid me). Almost without fail, they now talk of being extremely sheltered as children, immature, and involved in relationships in which they felt that their feelings were totally ignored, or they were treated as props. One -- whom I'm really close with now, but I wasn't then -- was involved in an extremely abusive relationship for three years in high school with a White guy three years her senior (she skipped a grade and he was two grades ahead of her). Besides the racist aspect of Asian fetishes, there's also a seedy undercurrent of abuse and control. To this day, I don't trust that when I see older men with younger Asian women that their relationship is likely kosher. I'm sure that plenty of them are, but I've seen enough of that dynamic in my life to know that it frequently isn't.
On the flip side, what would happen is that we'd have a large pool of Asian men who didn't have dates. I dated several of them in high school, as did a White friend of mine who was also known for being loud and outspoken. Both of us were accused of being lesbians (I'm actually bisexual leaning gay, but I didn't know it then and it had no impact on who I dated and why in high school) because we liked "feminine" men (we also dated and flirted with White guys, but they were mostly intimidated by us). It was also assumed that we brow-beat them into submission, and that they were our "bitches". That word was actually used several times, especially when we were doing couple-things. If there was a couple of an older White boy and a younger Asian girl, and she expressed how she liked his outfit, it was perceived as her being submissive and sweet (barf). If I did the same and I was dating an Asian boy at the time, it was taken that I dressed him myself, contrary to his wishes, and then was controlling him and praising myself for dressing him to my whims. It was really frustrating. Of course, those relationships never lasted because of the outside perception that whomever I was dating was less masculine than me put too much strain on it for the relationship to get off the ground.
There's that considerable dichotomy between how relationships between Asian girls and White guys are read versus how relationships between White girls and Asian guys are seen. I observed it all in high school and college and trust me... there was a quite obvious trend towards racism, sexism, and abuse.
Jess — March 5, 2010
This whole issue reminds me of this BBC documentary show called «Thai Brides»
(part 1 is here) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pmy_fnFqjfM
A BBC journalist visits a marriage agency set up in Thailand by an British man, designed to set up westen men with thai women. The marriage agency specificlly targets men who have had no luck with western women (presumably because they're too assertive - feminism is blamed at some point), and want to try their luck with a more submissive (and therefore asian, apparently), woman (or "lady", as they call them)
The language used to describe the Thai women ressembles that of the dating website very closely, but with the added "bonus" of getting to hear it directly come out of a real person's mouth, which is very creepy.
heather — March 5, 2010
"good head for finance" HA!!! my Korean mother does NOT have a good head for finance. she looooves buying stuff--and i mean random crap, just for the heck of it. oh mom.
Cat — March 6, 2010
This was just absolutely appalling and frustrating to take in.
nadine — March 6, 2010
long time lurker commenting.
i'm not asian, but i've seen this same sort of weird targeted affection land on me during my dating years. In new situations, I'm pretty soft spoken, and moderate in all topics. I try to be kind. I tended to dress 'modestly', but geez, it was b/c my finances were limited, and i bought boring classic stuff so i could wear them for multiple years.
Anyway for quite a while i was a magnet for dudes who wanted a 'lady'. Over and over when i'd get asked out under the most unlikely circumstances i'd be told it was b/c i was 'a lady'. The guy asking would know zilch about me, but he wanted me for a date b/c of my innate 'lady-ness'.
WTF is a lady anyway?
It was really creepy. Just b/c I presented pleasantly in public didn't mean that I was a pushover. I'm a feminist, and i've never hesitated to speak up on my behalf or others. I'm an architect and I went to a mostly male program where I held my own and managed to intimidate a lot of potential harassers by my sharp tongue. I was politically active and walked miles doing door to door for progressive candidates. All of the 'realities' of me were completely uninterested to my wanna be 'fellas' b/c I was a 'lady'.
I don't know what its like to be an object of desire for ethnicity, but i share the annoyance of being ignored as a person in favor of someone 'hanging' their preconceived notions of a lady over my person.
How many participating in this discussion have gone thru the 'lady' fetish? Looking for a 'lady' is certainly the generic cousin of looking for an asian 'lady'.
bdgold — March 6, 2010
While some of the ads are clearly aimed at the "yellow fever" fantasy guy, there is also a fetishization of white men by some Asian women. White men are seen as "less demanding" and perhaps even "liberators," as white men are sometimes perceived as less entitled--and might even do a portion of the house work. An interesting study of "white flight" as my friends call it can be found in the book "Women on the Verge" about views of white males in Japanese society.
Maedchenmannschaft » Blog Archive » Linksammlung — March 9, 2010
[...] Images werden gerade Stereotype thematisiert, die in vielen (westlichen) Ländern über asiatische Frauen (als vermeintlich kulturell homogene [...]
Eastern Values « PigeonPropaganda — March 10, 2010
[...] Eastern Values “>Our beautiful Asian women all live in the US already. They will not try to marry you to g... [...]
Orient Brides - Asian women dating site, beautiful Asian girls want to meet you — March 11, 2010
[...] The Submissive Asian Stereotype: Classy Asian Ladies Dating Site » .. [...]
Stormy — April 2, 2010
Actually, with the Think Geek T-shirt, it apparently started out as fetishization of Japanese culture in general. At one point I owned the equivalent T-Shirt: “now accepting applications for Japanese boyfriends.”
Unfortunately when I went to pull the link to the boyfriends shirt, it no longer exists. I believe I'll take that as a signal that even when a company tries not to be sexist, market forces can prompt the discontinuation of a less-popular product, causing the appearance of sexist (or racist) motives.
TooShy to Date — April 5, 2010
Personally I think any men or women signing up to a service promising sterotypes on both sides are in for a shock/disappointment if they ever date/get married through it. In fact the same is true if you go into any kind of relationship with pre-conceived ideas. Everyone is different with their own personality, not sterotypical clones.
Blinn — April 5, 2010
Please keep in mind that white men are NOT the only ones who are after mail order brides:
South Korean men abuse filipina brides:
http://www.koreatimes.co.kr/www/news/nation/2009/10/211_53320.html
I do not post this in order to make Korean men look bad, but to remind us all that some of these phenomenon are simply not limited to white, western men.
Blinn — April 5, 2010
And also: a New York Times article about Korean men and mailorder brides:
From the article:
"It is a similar story across South Korea, where hundreds of thousands of foreign women have been immigrating in recent years, often in marriages arranged by brokers. They have been making up for a shortage of eligible Korean women, particularly in underdeveloped rural areas."
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/29/world/asia/29babies.html?_r=1&ref=global-home
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/22/world/asia/22brides.html?fta=y
TooShy to Date — April 10, 2010
A similar thing happened in Japan years ago, with rural men having to seek out wives from other countries because many Japanese women wanted a 'new man' (which meant a western-thinking style man who allowed them to work in an office etc and didn't expect them to do all the housework(bit of a myth that last one in some cases)) or some didn't want a man at all but wanted to follow a career in Tokyo and abroad instead. The farmers even held a mass rally, driving their farm tractors into the city to gain exposure and tried to prove, in interviews and TV specials, that they were nice men and so on. It was sort of a clash betwenn old-style rural Japanese living and the Modern world in Tokyo and other big cities.
“Entirely Focused on Ensuring Your Comfort” » Sociological Images — May 27, 2010
[...] ad seems to rely to some degree on the stereotype of the submissive Asian woman, or more specifically, the geisha — a Japanese woman trained in the art of serving and [...]
flowerblossom — June 14, 2010
Dummy’s Guide to Asian Girls with White Fever
The WHIGGIE (White Guy Groupie)
A brief profile of Asian girls afflicted with “White Fever”
ORIGINS: A subset of women of Asian ethnicity, usually found residing in major U.S. cities, although they have been known to appear overseas occasionally. Closely related to their cousins, Yellow Cabs (Japan), Gwei-Po’s (Hong Kong), Sarong Party girls (Singapore), Twinkies and Bananas.
NOT TO BE CONUSED WITH: Intelligent, emotionally-secure women who are free of identity problems, self-hate, racial prejudice and chips on their shoulders.
CHARACTER TRAITS
- Poorly developed self-identity. Pathetically insecure with themselves and their ethnicity.
- Resentment of father’s traditional, authoritarian upbringing (whether real or perceived).
- Brainwashed into believing that they, as AF’s, are more desirable than other women in exotic lotus blossom kinda way. Willingness to pander to western media sexual stereotypes of AF’s, which they perceive as marketing advantage.
- Thoroughly whitewashed. Desperate need to fit into “mainstream” (i.e. white) society and to distance themselves from their Asian heritage. Racial inferiority complex.
- Feigned air of superiority when dealing with members of own race and any other minority groups. In need of major attitude adjustments.
- Exaggerated, whiny, Encino-esque valley girl accent.
- Delusions of grandeur… “I want it all…and that begins with the right (i.e. white) guy…” Asian-American princess complex.
- Uncanny ability of determine one’s nationality, occupation, earning capacity and make of auto within three minutes of commencing a conversation.
- Exaggerated perception of white males’ value in increasing AF’s social status.
- Ignorant and narrow-minded, eager to adopt and perpetuate fallacious western media stereotypes of Asian men.
- A compulsion to trash Asians, particularly Asian men, in order to justify their autoracist tendencies, placate their guilt and bolster their self-esteem.
- Extremely shallow, self-centered, argumentative and boring.
- Disdains ethnic studies; regards it as a major threat to her carefully constructed, self-deceptive whiggie identity.
- Despises all Asian men, with the occasional exception of their brothers (after all, they share the same genes.
- Believes that racism does not exist because she, as an AF, has never experienced it first hand, or is too dense to realize it. Besides, those Asiaphiles are so nice to her (while plotting to get into her pants.
- Gets a warm fuzzy feeling when watching The Joy Luck Club, while snuggled up to her geeky Asiaphile boyfriend.
- Believes that the only reason an Asian person would disrespect her is because they are racist.
- Has lost count of how many WM’s she’s done this month.
- The wet-dream come true for socially-handicapped Caucasian nerds who are unable to attract Caucasian women.
- Threatened and insecure in the presence of any culturally-perceptive Asian person or any AM not fitting her stereotype of the quiet , marginalized, “model minority” geek.
- Fundamentally insecure, utterly confused, lacking in self respect.
- Many aging whiggies, after being used and abandoned by WM’s in favor of younger, more nubile whiggies and being rejected by AM’s who see through their transparency, develop a bitterness towards all men, period.
- Denial of all of the above.
FACIAL EXPRESSIONS: a) Look of contempt when eyes meet those of any non-white male, converting to beaming grin upon sighting of WM victim/target; b) terminal pout or c) bimboish expression that defies deep thought.
TYPICAL ATTIRE: Anything trendy, mainstream-looking and seductive (especially if it’s black and tight). Big hair (perhaps their most valuable asset) tossed with hand every 15 seconds. Wonderbra. Fanatical whiggies have been known to undergo certain procedures such as eyelid surgery, breast augmentation and vaginal tightening operations in order to increase their marketability to WM’s. Blue contact lenses and bleached blonde hair have even been sported on occasion. Note: Attire may vary depending on the specific type of WM being targeted.
I.Q: Too low to measure.
NATURAL HABITAT:
Personal ad columns (“exotic, slim, SAF seeks successful, generous SWM”), cheerleading squads, sorority houses (role: token “oriental sisters”), T.V. newsdesks, B-grade Kung-Fu flicks, trendy nightclubs (usually found necking with aging WM’s), Chinese restaurants (slumming with the WM and demonstrating that she’s “in touch with her heritage”), anywhere else frequented by White males.
TYPICAL WHIGGIE QUIPS:
Age 10: “Mom, why do we have to be (Chinese/Japanese/Korean)? Do you have to dress like that? And what’s with Dad and his accent?
Age 12: “Mom, I want an eyelid job for Christmas, okay?
Later on…
“I’ve always only dated white guys. I don’t know why, I just have.”
“Race doesn’t matter. I just happen to like white guys. It’s just a preference.”
“We are the world, we are the children...We…”
“I’ve gone out with all kinds of guys…Dutch, English, French, German, you name it. Even went out with a Jewish guy once! After all, love is color blind.”
“Eeeew, Jennifer, how could you go out with that (insert minority group here) guy!?” Totally gross!
“Oooh Roger, you’re like soooo strong and intelligent. Did you say you drive a beemer? Kewl! (giggle).”
“I want to learn English better…you maybe teach, handsome man? Are you U.S. citizen?” (Yes FOB’s can be whiggies too!)
“Like why would I want to go out with an Asian guy? They don’t own me or anything. Uhh, and besides they are all male chauvinist …and domineering too…yeah that’s it! Didn’t you see The Joy Luck Club?”
Like, I’m dating *out* of my race, so how can I be racists?!! Duh!!
CLOSELY RELATED TO: Racists, bigots, wannabes, ho’s, chameleons, white supremacists, a fish out of water.
MEDIA REPRESENTATION/ROLE MODELS: Connie Chung, Amy Tan, Lisa Ling, Margaret Cho, Sheryl Wu Dunn, any of The Joy Luck Club protagonists (except the one who married an Asian dude).
NATURAL COUNTERPARTS: Asiaphiles…who else?
James — October 14, 2010
I'm going to give a counter argument here. Have you not considered the fact that men who date asian women are also subject to all the stereotypes about their intentions? Reading this article and some of these comments almost makes me feel like I should be ashamed for liking, well loving, an asian women (my girlfriend of three years). Yes, I might have some stereotypically geeky traits in the sense I like asian culture, but I certainly haven't just fallen in love with an asian women based on misconceptions of submissiveness etc. On the contrary, I know full well that women in Japan (where my girlfriend is from)are not submissive at all. She often works 90 hour weeks, is very driven and goal orientated. Our relationship is remarkably equal. We cook for each other, each pay our fair share of the bills, house work and cooking chores are shared. In fact, it is much fairer than relationships I have been in in the past. As she is from Japan (which no matter what you say, is not a gender equal country), there are some expectations on me as a man. Many Japanese men work very hard to provide for their families and their expectation that they do so. It is not a one-way street you know. Western guys who think that dating a women is actually from asia (I am not referring to someone who is only ethnically asian) is an easy option are mistaken. They are women and the relationship you have with them will have the same amount of challenges that you can expect in a relationship with a woman from anywhere in the world.
So, I am just asking you to be careful about stereotyping white men in relationships with asian women. You are in a sense demonizing those relationships despite the fact the couple could be perfectly happy with each other and the equality of their relationship. I just want to be happy and left alone in peace with my girlfriend. Not have people making presumptions about how I met her or why I am with her.
James — October 14, 2010
I'm going to give a counter argument here. Have you not considered the fact that men who date asian women are also subject to all the stereotypes about their intentions? Reading this article and some of these comments almost makes me feel like I should be ashamed for liking, well loving, an asian women (my girlfriend of three years). Yes, I might have some stereotypically geeky traits in the sense I like asian culture, but I certainly haven't just fallen in love with an asian women based on misconceptions of submissiveness etc. On the contrary, I know full well that women in Japan (where my girlfriend is from)are not submissive at all. She often works 90 hour weeks, is very driven and goal orientated. Our relationship is remarkably equal. We cook for each other, each pay our fair share of the bills, house work and cooking chores are shared. In fact, it is much fairer than relationships I have been in in the past. As she is from Japan (which no matter what you say, is not a gender equal country), there are some expectations on me as a man. Many Japanese men work very hard to provide for their families and society holds expectations that they do so. It is not a one-way street you know. Western guys who think that dating a women, who is actually from asia (I am not referring to someone who is only ethnically asian), is an easy option are mistaken. They are women and the relationship you have with them will have the same amount of challenges that you can expect in a relationship with a woman from anywhere in the world.
So, I am just asking you to be careful about stereotyping white men in relationships with asian women. You are in a sense demonizing those relationships despite the fact the couple could be perfectly happy with each other and the equality of their relationship. I just want to be happy and left alone in peace with my girlfriend. Not have people making presumptions about how I met her or why I am with her.
James — October 14, 2010
I'm going to give a counter argument here. Have you not considered the fact that men who date asian women are also subject to all the stereotypes about their intentions? Reading this article and some of these comments almost makes me feel like I should be ashamed for liking, well loving, an asian women (my girlfriend of three years). Yes, I might have some stereotypically geeky traits in the sense I like asian culture, but I certainly haven't just fallen in love with an asian women based on misconceptions of submissiveness etc. On the contrary, I know full well that women in Japan (where my girlfriend is from)are not submissive at all. She often works 90 hour weeks, is very driven and goal orientated. Our relationship is remarkably equal. We cook for each other, each pay our fair share of the bills, house work and cooking chores are shared. In fact, it is much fairer than relationships I have been in in the past. As she is from Japan (which no matter what you say, is not a gender equal country), there are some expectations on me as a man. Many Japanese men work very hard to provide for their families and society holds expectations that they do so. It is not a one-way street you know. Western guys who think that dating a women, who is actually from asia (I am not referring to someone who is only ethnically asian), is an easy option are mistaken. They are women and the relationship you have with them will have the same amount of challenges that you can expect in a relationship with a woman from anywhere in the world.
So, I am just asking you to be careful about stereotyping white men in relationships with asian women. You are in a sense demonizing those relationships despite the fact the couple could be perfectly happy with each other and the equality of their relationship. I just want to be happy and left alone in peace with my girlfriend. Not have people making presumptions about how I met her or why I am with her and interfering with what we have. I feel in a liberal society that is my right.
Benjamin — October 23, 2010
I'm so sick of this post-modern nonsense about how all stereotypes are 100% false.
You can actually say that people from Africa tend to have darker skin, and it's a stereotype and a generalization but also true.
Let's talk about how Western (or Westernized) feminists - especially in America - actually fetishize maleness and evaluate women on how masculine they can become. (No, masculinity and femininity are not complete cultural constructs - they are fundamentally underpinned by biological and evolutionary constants.)
Not surprisingly, this post-modern American feminist value system is a huge turn off for most American men, and probably has a lot to do with the collapsing marriage rates in this country.
What you are really upset about is that some women have not bought into your value system and actually celebrate their femininity - their difference - and men consciously like it.
phoebe — November 23, 2010
I am way late to this party, but I'd like to point out that this thinking sometimes also applies in the gay scene. I am a straight white female, and one of my closest friends is a gay Filipino guy and we are both in our mid-20's. He occasionally invites (begs) me to go to events with him if he doesn't have a date, not to pose as his date but more like a friend-chaperone. He complains of constantly being hit on by aggressive white men who see exactly what this article illustrates as stereotypes for Asian women.
This is only one anecdote - I have no surveys or studies to cite (so I don't know how prevalent it is), but I thought you all may find it interesting given the breadth of gender, race, and sexuality issues frequently explored in this site's array of awesome articles.
moritheil — December 2, 2010
I'm also late to this, but no one but Stormy has noted the context in which the shirt existed: it was clearly meant as a tongue-in-cheek evocation of Oriental fetishism to begin with (indeed, most ThinkGeek shirts are humorous.) See the description at the original creators' site:
http://www.jbox.com/product/SHIRT-GFW
"One the most famous designs we've ever made, with a clear kanji design that will amuse and delight any Japanese you bump into . . . "
From which we can gather that the creators assumed it was so absurd that any Japanese readers would easily identify it as a joke.
The stereotype certainly exists. The shirt, however, isn't a good example to complain about, unless you wish to send the message that you can't distinguish a parody from a legitimate article.
Tooshy — January 20, 2011
Well spotted, people are often too quick to jump on the literary linchmob wagon, being outraged without knowing what they're supposed to be outraged at. Or being outraged about something that isn't really what the original instigating element was intended for.
Aussie — January 30, 2011
Most Asian women prefer their own type and think white men are ugly meatheads and easy to be cheated.
A survey proves that ONLY two types of Asian women would date white males:
1) Lower than average looking(ugly) or middle aged divorced women who obviously can't get a normal Asian BF at home
2) Hookers, those can be seen mostly in the city accompanying a white man like normal couples, but they're mostly hookers who came here to earn some fast $(around $100-200/hr), they cheat white men for living and spend the $ with their own Asian lovers
Blix — July 13, 2011
One thing: Asian women living in the U.S. is an oxymoron, since clearly if she is in the U.S. she would most likely be American. I get very tired of "racial" descriptions being the only way we define others.
Aychengster — September 8, 2011
Leave it to whitie to ruin every part of your culture... they stole the Native Americans' land, enslaved the Africans, stole the South Americans' children (Elian Gonzalez), and now they're subjugating Asian women.
I feel like singing some Muse right now!
Korean Gender Reader « The Grand Narrative — September 17, 2011
[...] experiences, both on the street and on dates, represent the intersection of generic sexism and the stereotype of the submissive, hyper-feminized Asian woman, [...]
Alissa — December 13, 2011
This is all kinds of bad blended together to create something even worse. The site sounds like they're selling something like wholesale clothing instead of, well, people. Gah.
Guest — December 27, 2011
Great post. As an Asian woman I find yellow fever at times grotesque and sexist..
P4cman — February 7, 2012
i go to an all boys university. and there are no classy asian women here. i am so disappointed. why does this happen to me. i am so unlucky. i hope all of you ppl with nice asian girl friends with dem big ol titties brag hard. cuz dats what i'd do if i had one. oh i'm a black male by the way
Brian — May 13, 2012
Here we go again! White guys can't do anything without being accused of racism or sexism. Why don't you leave us alone and focus on your own life. No one has the balls to say anything about a black asian relationship. How about a hispanic caucasian relationship? So now I'm limited to only dating in my own race or else I'm a creepy pervert? You people are the sick finger pointing racists. Live and let live. Get your slimy thoughts out of the sewage. Us white guys can date whoever the **** we want to. We are nice people too. Back off!!
From Bruno Mars to Lucy Liu: Asian-Americans in U.S. pop culture | Blind Mouse Entertainment — June 16, 2012
[...] with a small penis. If you’re female, then you’re either hypersexual or you’re totally innocent. (Or, somehow, both.) Then, of course, there’s the stereotypes about not speaking English [...]
Canadian_gurrl87 — September 18, 2012
Personally when I think of "asian women" I think of those badass martial arts master's in kung fu movies. Not the delicate flowers being described here.
jen — April 12, 2013
I think the other Jen, the one right below me kind of sums up the whole thing. Only lesbians date asian guys. lol.
http://asianbdsmerotica.blogspot.com/
Sociological Images course guide: Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders : Asian-Nation : Asian American News, Issues, & Current Events Blog — April 16, 2013
[...] Classy Asian Ladies Dating Site [...]
Paulus Magus — December 20, 2014
I certainly don't have a 'generalized fantasy' of Asian women, but the fact that women from East and Southeast Asia have a more traditional and patriarchal social structure is undeniable. Some people think this is a good thing.
I would never date an American woman, Asian or not. I would, however, date a woman from Myanmar.
Many men also find a lot of the physical traits of the various ladies of Asia to be quite attractive; personally I think the prevalence of nice skin, great hair and a fit body is nowhere on Earth more than in Asia. Is this some fantasy stereotype? No, it's demographics and hereditary traits.
yellow fever - Femme Fatale — March 10, 2018
[…] white men have a preference for Asian women, but why? The answer varies depending on whom you ask. Some argue that it’s because Asian women are more docile, submissive, and tame than their raucous and […]