Thanks to Broadsheet, I just discovered this new blog called Act Like a Man. by Edward Keenan, a writer for The Walrus (Canada’s New Yorker). Here’s his inaugural post, from March. And here’s what Jezebel has to say. Thoughts? And hey, I’m currently compiling a list of “man blogs”–blogs by men, exploring masculinity–so if you see one you think I might not know about, I’d be so grateful for the heads up!
men
I find it heartening to wake up to this news bit sent to me by CCF this morning: Men have more and more stepped up to the plate in sharing housework and childcare. The longer a wife works, the more housework her husband does. Hallelujah amen.
According to a briefing paper prepared in advance of the 11th Annual Conference of the Council on Contemporary Families, April 25-26, 2008 at the University of Illinois in Chicago, (“Men’s Changing Contribution to Housework and Child Care,” by researchers Oriel Sullivan and Scott Coltrane):
For thirty years, researchers studying the changes in family dynamics since the rise of the women’s movement have concluded that, despite gains in the world of education, work, and politics, women face a “stalled revolution” at home. According to many studies, men’s family work has barely budged in response to women’s increased employment. The typical punch line of many news stories has been that even though women are working longer hours on the job and cutting back their own housework, men are not picking up the slack.
But new research suggests that these studies were based on unrealistic hopes for instant transformation. Such studies, explain Sullivan and Coltrane, underestimated the amount of change going on behind the scenes and “the growing willingness of men to adapt to their wives’ new behaviors and values.”
In fact, it turns out, more couples are sharing family tasks than ever before. The movement toward sharing has been especially significant full-time dual-earner
couples.
Interestingly, whatever a man’s original resistance to sharing, men’s contributions to family work increase over time. In other words, the longer their female partners have been in paid employment, the more family work they are likely to do.
Bottom line is this: “American couples have made remarkable progress in working out mutually satisfying arrangements to share the responsibilities of breadwinning and family care. And polls continue to show increasing approval of such arrangements. So the revolution in gender aspirations and behaviors has not stalled.”
But lest we we women of the second and third shift get too excited, here’s where things are stalled: getting employers to accommodate workers’ desires. And high earners are forced to work ever longer hours. Less affluent earners face wage or benefit cuts and layoffs that often force them to work more than one job. Aside from winning paid parental leave laws in Washington and California (with similar bills being considered in Illinois, Massachusetts, New Jersey, and New York), families have made little headway in getting the kind of family friendly policies that are taken for granted in most other advanced industrial countries.
So even as American couples’ beliefs and desires about gender equity have grown to be among the highest in the world, America’s work policies and social support systems for working parents are among the lowest. Depressing, to say the least.
All in all, the “stalled revolution” in America is not taking place in families but in the highest circles of our economic and political elites.
For more information on this report, contact:
Scott Coltrane, Professor of Sociology, University of California
Riverside, (951) 827-2443; cell: (951) 858-1831 scott.coltrane@ucr.edu
Professor Oriel Sullivan, Department of Behavioral Sciences, Ben
Gurion University sullivan@bgu.ac.il, +972 86472056
If in North Carolina, please do come out to hear anthology editor Shira Tarrant talk about her new book, Men Speak Out: Views on Gender, Sex, and Power. I’m in the middle of the collection right now and I swear, it’s great.
Event: Men Speak Out
“Author Reading and Town Hall Meeting on Men, Masculinity and Feminism”
What: Informational Meeting
Host: Women’s and Gender Studies
When: Tuesday, February 26 at 4:00pm
Where: Elliot University Center, Alexander Room, UNCG
RSVP here.
More events posted here. I can’t wait til Shira and the guys come to NYC!
Check out this fresh take on those who are male, single and not your stereotype in the Canadian Press.
In sum, the article argues, a lot of attention gets paid to single women, who can cheer themselves with chick flicks, self-help books and shows like “Sex and the City,” which aim to empower female consumers to think of singledom as independence or self-reliance. But while single women have seemingly banded together to change their image in the popular culture, there’s been no such battle cry for men, who have a whole different set of stereotypes to fight: They’re confirmed bachelors, James Bond-style playboys, cranky old men or gay.
Ok, I get the point. But somehow this just isn’t resonating for me. Thoughts?
Ok, so clearly I’m on an image raid this morning. This is the cover of a new collection of short stories that circle around the themes of contemporary masculinity and war, which Courtney reviewed. Says she, these “stories explore domestic violence, rape, thwarted love, miscarriages, familial relationships etc. Basically there isn’t a hot button issue concerning masculinity and violence that this volume doesn’t touch, although always in an artful, complex way.” I think this just became the book I’m reading next. (Thanks, C!)
I remain slightly stunned that Hillary came in not second but third in Iowa last night. And at the way she is painted the establishment candidate. And at the strength of the venom against her. More election commentary coming soon from guest poster, sociologist Virginia Rutter. In the meantime, a quick bit on two books, just out:
Men Speak Out: Views on Gender, Sex and Power–a new anthology edited by Shira Tarrant–compiles the voices of 40 men who explore issues of masculinity, sexuality, identity, and positive change. The book lays issues on the table that are sure to stimulate a lively debate. It’s starting already at myspace and facebook. Check it.
Next up, Making Love, Playing Power: Men, Women, & the Rewards of Intimate Justice, by family therapist and organizational consultant Ken Dolan-Del Vecchio, debunks superficial theories about communication styles and geder roles and, according to the book’s description, “gets to the real reason so many relationships are in trouble — misuse of power.” The book reveals how gender, race, sexual orientation, and money set the foundation for personal power, and how power as domination drives most conflicts whether between nations, interest groups, or individuals. Join Ken at Bluestockings Bookstore in Manhattan on February 13 for a reading…!
I’m sick as a dog today, lying in bed with the covers pulled up to my nose (and my loyal cat at my feet). Can’t quite put a sentence together, so thought I’d just share a few quick links, following on yesterday’s post.
The Evolution of Dad Project weighs in on the Daddy Wars, noting, “The conflict isn’t being perceived between Traditional Dads and the Stay-At-Home Dads (which would be obvious manufactured companion to the ‘Mommy Wars’) but between dads who desire to have more of a work/family balance and their bosses, who are more typically dads themselves at a slightly older age and bred more on being more of a dedicated breadwinner.”
And the BBC reports on new research from the Institute for Social and Economic Research finds that mothers who work outside the home are happier than SAHMs, via Broadsheet
I hear cannons booming. Or maybe that’s just my head?
I love this piece by Stephanie Armour appearing in USA Today last week, right down to its title: “Workplace Tensions Rise as Dads Seek Family Time.†A synopsis:
Todd Scott leaves his job every day at 5 p.m. to be with his family – and even then feels guilty he isn’t spending enough time with Hunter, 4, and Anna, 1. By contrast, Scott’s boss, Steve Himmelrich, who has two children and is a more traditional-style dad, spends long days, free time and some weekends at the office. Both acknowledge these differing choices have been a source of tension between them. Their situation reflects the conflicts that are becoming increasingly common in workplaces across the nation, as fathers press for more family time and something other than a traditional career path. Dads are demanding paternity leave, flexible work schedules, telecommuting and other new benefits. They’ve also prompted several Fortune 500 companies to begin pitching such family-friendly benefits to men – and inspired a new wave of workplace discrimination complaints filed by dads.
The article cites a survey by Monster that found nearly 70% of fathers surveyed reporting that they would consider being a stay-at-home parent if money were no object. And–are you sitting down?–“the survey also found that working dads are increasingly tapping into benefits that until just a few years ago were used almost exclusively by mothers: 71% of fathers with a child under age 5 took paternity leave when it was offered by their employer.” This goes counter to what I’ve heard from researchers. Help me out here. Is this good news true?! (If it is, count me in for a happy dance.)
Analysts attribute the change to generation. Today’s fathers in their 20s and 30s don’t typically adhere to the philosophies or career tracks followed by previous generations. To wit:
For generations, “Fathers have defined success as big cars, big salaries, big homes. But dads now define success as a good relationship with their children and spouse,” says Armin Brott of Fathers At Work, an Oakland-based business that specializes in helping men find a balance between work and family. “It’s really a generational change, but it’s hard,” Brott says. “There’s tension, and there’s this sense out there that careers will suffer.”
Clearly, that sense needs to be corrected with some data. My dream is that organizations like Catalyst will soon be taking this on. Sounds like Fathers at Work is already on it. Their tagline is “Transforming Job-Family Conflict into Competitive Advantage.” And they offer companies workshops called “Balancing Father Stress and Professional Success.” I can’t wait to interview these guys for my next book.
Check out this piece from The Onion, “Man Finally Put In Charge Of Struggling Feminist Movement.” Highlights:
“All the feminist movement needed to do was bring on someone who had the balls to do something about this glass ceiling business,” said McGowan, who quickly closed the 23.5 percent gender wage gap by “making a few calls to the big boys upstairs.” “In the world of gender identity and empowered female sexuality, it’s all about who you know.”
McGowan, who was selected from a pool of roughly 150 million candidates, made eliminating sexual harassment his first priority before working on securing reproductive rights for women in all 50 states, and promoting healthy body images through an influx of strong, independent female characters in TV, magazines, and film.
“It’s about time,” McGowan said upon returning from a golf game with several “network honchos” in which he brokered a deal to bring a variety of women’s sports to prime-time television. “These ladies should have brought me on years ago.”
(Thanks to my man Marco for the heads up. Photo cred.)
Paul Raeburn had a great post the other week up at HuffPo on older dads on the campaign trail. Yep, Sen. Christopher Dodd, 63, has two daughters, age 6 and 2, with his second wife Jackie Clegg Dodd. And Sen. Fred Thompson of Tennessee, 65, has two toddlers with his second wife, Jeri Kehn.
What exactly do we read in these tea leaves?, asks Paul. First, that these two candidates mirror a demographic trend. Older fathers are on the rise. That’s not too surprising. But here’s the rub: the children of older fathers face particularly high risks of schizophrenia and autism. Drrr. On a personal level, I hate hearing that stuff. But do check out Paul’s post. Paul is a journalist who writes quite smartly about various permutations of contemporary fatherhood. I keep trying to get him to guest post here, and sense that one day soon, he will!
Also on the dad front, check out Judith Warner’s response to Charlie LeDuff’s essay in Men’s Vogue, which she titles“Daddy Wars,” and which begins like so:
“One of the more pleasant outcomes of the slowly growing trend toward highly involved fatherhood has been, I’ve found, the ability to plainly see that total ninnyishness is not a uniquely female thing.” Read more.
I find it heartening to wake up to this news bit sent to me by CCF this morning: Men have more and more stepped up to the plate in sharing housework and childcare. The longer a wife works, the more housework her husband does. Hallelujah amen.
According to a briefing paper prepared in advance of the 11th Annual Conference of the Council on Contemporary Families, April 25-26, 2008 at the University of Illinois in Chicago, (“Men’s Changing Contribution to Housework and Child Care,” by researchers Oriel Sullivan and Scott Coltrane):
For thirty years, researchers studying the changes in family dynamics since the rise of the women’s movement have concluded that, despite gains in the world of education, work, and politics, women face a “stalled revolution” at home. According to many studies, men’s family work has barely budged in response to women’s increased employment. The typical punch line of many news stories has been that even though women are working longer hours on the job and cutting back their own housework, men are not picking up the slack.
But new research suggests that these studies were based on unrealistic hopes for instant transformation. Such studies, explain Sullivan and Coltrane, underestimated the amount of change going on behind the scenes and “the growing willingness of men to adapt to their wives’ new behaviors and values.”
In fact, it turns out, more couples are sharing family tasks than ever before. The movement toward sharing has been especially significant full-time dual-earner
couples.
Interestingly, whatever a man’s original resistance to sharing, men’s contributions to family work increase over time. In other words, the longer their female partners have been in paid employment, the more family work they are likely to do.
Bottom line is this: “American couples have made remarkable progress in working out mutually satisfying arrangements to share the responsibilities of breadwinning and family care. And polls continue to show increasing approval of such arrangements. So the revolution in gender aspirations and behaviors has not stalled.”
But lest we we women of the second and third shift get too excited, here’s where things are stalled: getting employers to accommodate workers’ desires. And high earners are forced to work ever longer hours. Less affluent earners face wage or benefit cuts and layoffs that often force them to work more than one job. Aside from winning paid parental leave laws in Washington and California (with similar bills being considered in Illinois, Massachusetts, New Jersey, and New York), families have made little headway in getting the kind of family friendly policies that are taken for granted in most other advanced industrial countries.
So even as American couples’ beliefs and desires about gender equity have grown to be among the highest in the world, America’s work policies and social support systems for working parents are among the lowest. Depressing, to say the least.
All in all, the “stalled revolution” in America is not taking place in families but in the highest circles of our economic and political elites.
For more information on this report, contact:
Scott Coltrane, Professor of Sociology, University of California
Riverside, (951) 827-2443; cell: (951) 858-1831 scott.coltrane@ucr.edu
Professor Oriel Sullivan, Department of Behavioral Sciences, Ben
Gurion University sullivan@bgu.ac.il, +972 86472056
If in North Carolina, please do come out to hear anthology editor Shira Tarrant talk about her new book, Men Speak Out: Views on Gender, Sex, and Power. I’m in the middle of the collection right now and I swear, it’s great.
Event: Men Speak Out
“Author Reading and Town Hall Meeting on Men, Masculinity and Feminism”
What: Informational Meeting
Host: Women’s and Gender Studies
When: Tuesday, February 26 at 4:00pm
Where: Elliot University Center, Alexander Room, UNCG
RSVP here.
More events posted here. I can’t wait til Shira and the guys come to NYC!
Check out this fresh take on those who are male, single and not your stereotype in the Canadian Press.
In sum, the article argues, a lot of attention gets paid to single women, who can cheer themselves with chick flicks, self-help books and shows like “Sex and the City,” which aim to empower female consumers to think of singledom as independence or self-reliance. But while single women have seemingly banded together to change their image in the popular culture, there’s been no such battle cry for men, who have a whole different set of stereotypes to fight: They’re confirmed bachelors, James Bond-style playboys, cranky old men or gay.
Ok, I get the point. But somehow this just isn’t resonating for me. Thoughts?
Ok, so clearly I’m on an image raid this morning. This is the cover of a new collection of short stories that circle around the themes of contemporary masculinity and war, which Courtney reviewed. Says she, these “stories explore domestic violence, rape, thwarted love, miscarriages, familial relationships etc. Basically there isn’t a hot button issue concerning masculinity and violence that this volume doesn’t touch, although always in an artful, complex way.” I think this just became the book I’m reading next. (Thanks, C!)
I remain slightly stunned that Hillary came in not second but third in Iowa last night. And at the way she is painted the establishment candidate. And at the strength of the venom against her. More election commentary coming soon from guest poster, sociologist Virginia Rutter. In the meantime, a quick bit on two books, just out:
Men Speak Out: Views on Gender, Sex and Power–a new anthology edited by Shira Tarrant–compiles the voices of 40 men who explore issues of masculinity, sexuality, identity, and positive change. The book lays issues on the table that are sure to stimulate a lively debate. It’s starting already at myspace and facebook. Check it.
Next up, Making Love, Playing Power: Men, Women, & the Rewards of Intimate Justice, by family therapist and organizational consultant Ken Dolan-Del Vecchio, debunks superficial theories about communication styles and geder roles and, according to the book’s description, “gets to the real reason so many relationships are in trouble — misuse of power.” The book reveals how gender, race, sexual orientation, and money set the foundation for personal power, and how power as domination drives most conflicts whether between nations, interest groups, or individuals. Join Ken at Bluestockings Bookstore in Manhattan on February 13 for a reading…!
I’m sick as a dog today, lying in bed with the covers pulled up to my nose (and my loyal cat at my feet). Can’t quite put a sentence together, so thought I’d just share a few quick links, following on yesterday’s post.
The Evolution of Dad Project weighs in on the Daddy Wars, noting, “The conflict isn’t being perceived between Traditional Dads and the Stay-At-Home Dads (which would be obvious manufactured companion to the ‘Mommy Wars’) but between dads who desire to have more of a work/family balance and their bosses, who are more typically dads themselves at a slightly older age and bred more on being more of a dedicated breadwinner.”
And the BBC reports on new research from the Institute for Social and Economic Research finds that mothers who work outside the home are happier than SAHMs, via Broadsheet
I hear cannons booming. Or maybe that’s just my head?
I love this piece by Stephanie Armour appearing in USA Today last week, right down to its title: “Workplace Tensions Rise as Dads Seek Family Time.†A synopsis:
Todd Scott leaves his job every day at 5 p.m. to be with his family – and even then feels guilty he isn’t spending enough time with Hunter, 4, and Anna, 1. By contrast, Scott’s boss, Steve Himmelrich, who has two children and is a more traditional-style dad, spends long days, free time and some weekends at the office. Both acknowledge these differing choices have been a source of tension between them. Their situation reflects the conflicts that are becoming increasingly common in workplaces across the nation, as fathers press for more family time and something other than a traditional career path. Dads are demanding paternity leave, flexible work schedules, telecommuting and other new benefits. They’ve also prompted several Fortune 500 companies to begin pitching such family-friendly benefits to men – and inspired a new wave of workplace discrimination complaints filed by dads.
The article cites a survey by Monster that found nearly 70% of fathers surveyed reporting that they would consider being a stay-at-home parent if money were no object. And–are you sitting down?–“the survey also found that working dads are increasingly tapping into benefits that until just a few years ago were used almost exclusively by mothers: 71% of fathers with a child under age 5 took paternity leave when it was offered by their employer.” This goes counter to what I’ve heard from researchers. Help me out here. Is this good news true?! (If it is, count me in for a happy dance.)
Analysts attribute the change to generation. Today’s fathers in their 20s and 30s don’t typically adhere to the philosophies or career tracks followed by previous generations. To wit:
For generations, “Fathers have defined success as big cars, big salaries, big homes. But dads now define success as a good relationship with their children and spouse,” says Armin Brott of Fathers At Work, an Oakland-based business that specializes in helping men find a balance between work and family. “It’s really a generational change, but it’s hard,” Brott says. “There’s tension, and there’s this sense out there that careers will suffer.”
Clearly, that sense needs to be corrected with some data. My dream is that organizations like Catalyst will soon be taking this on. Sounds like Fathers at Work is already on it. Their tagline is “Transforming Job-Family Conflict into Competitive Advantage.” And they offer companies workshops called “Balancing Father Stress and Professional Success.” I can’t wait to interview these guys for my next book.
Check out this piece from The Onion, “Man Finally Put In Charge Of Struggling Feminist Movement.” Highlights:
“All the feminist movement needed to do was bring on someone who had the balls to do something about this glass ceiling business,” said McGowan, who quickly closed the 23.5 percent gender wage gap by “making a few calls to the big boys upstairs.” “In the world of gender identity and empowered female sexuality, it’s all about who you know.”
McGowan, who was selected from a pool of roughly 150 million candidates, made eliminating sexual harassment his first priority before working on securing reproductive rights for women in all 50 states, and promoting healthy body images through an influx of strong, independent female characters in TV, magazines, and film.
“It’s about time,” McGowan said upon returning from a golf game with several “network honchos” in which he brokered a deal to bring a variety of women’s sports to prime-time television. “These ladies should have brought me on years ago.”
(Thanks to my man Marco for the heads up. Photo cred.)
Paul Raeburn had a great post the other week up at HuffPo on older dads on the campaign trail. Yep, Sen. Christopher Dodd, 63, has two daughters, age 6 and 2, with his second wife Jackie Clegg Dodd. And Sen. Fred Thompson of Tennessee, 65, has two toddlers with his second wife, Jeri Kehn.
What exactly do we read in these tea leaves?, asks Paul. First, that these two candidates mirror a demographic trend. Older fathers are on the rise. That’s not too surprising. But here’s the rub: the children of older fathers face particularly high risks of schizophrenia and autism. Drrr. On a personal level, I hate hearing that stuff. But do check out Paul’s post. Paul is a journalist who writes quite smartly about various permutations of contemporary fatherhood. I keep trying to get him to guest post here, and sense that one day soon, he will!
Also on the dad front, check out Judith Warner’s response to Charlie LeDuff’s essay in Men’s Vogue, which she titles“Daddy Wars,” and which begins like so:
“One of the more pleasant outcomes of the slowly growing trend toward highly involved fatherhood has been, I’ve found, the ability to plainly see that total ninnyishness is not a uniquely female thing.” Read more.
