I return after a most serious case of blogger’s block (yes, there is such a thing – wikipedia entry and all.) Initially, I thought it was just a post holiday digging out from all that gets put aside, but, no, I simply couldn’t sit down to write.

I now know that when this happens to me there’s something brewing personally.  My writing does tend to be reflexive – its just where I’m at these days.  Perhaps a result of turning 50.

I am on the NY thruway again, and I am crying.  I have just left my daughter, Lauren, once my very little girl, now a smart, funny, loveable young woman, to embark upon the adventures of her last semester of senior year in high school. I have had a very unusual high school experience with Lauren because she has attended a fabulous all-girl boarding school, Emma Willard, in Troy, NY. How’s this for a tag line?: “Since 1814, empowering girls who transform the world.”  Alums include Elizabeth Cady Stanton (1832), Jane Fonda (1955), and Kirsten Gillibrand (1984), (and my daughter, 2009!)

So, while other parents of teenagers have been dealing with curfews and parties, I have had the relative ease of knowing she is safe – surrounded by friends, houseparents and a faculty that have cultivated her extraordinary talents and focused her strengths.

I can no longer suspend the terrible truth. And it is just this: Next year, she’ll be a freshman in college.

Now I know what you might be thinking…….that’s what supposed to happen, isn’t it?

Yes.  And she is well prepared, mature, enthusiastic. But, I wonder, will she be safe?

My worries about what happens to young women in college are born, no doubt, from the many stories I have heard over the years in my clinical practice. Stories of tragedy and trauma, of assault, rape. I cringe just writing these words and thinking of my daughter in the same sentence.

It’s a very odd thing, this parenting.  We are responsible for every need, seemingly every breath, when they are infants; then those days of infinite closeness and safety melt away as they grow.  But if we are lucky, it is still a charmed existence:  springtime softball, autumn costumes, pure holiday magic.

Then, we’re supposed to let them go.

It sneeks up at first………..overnights with a friend, middle school dances.

Then the really big ones: driving and college. How are we supposed to just let them drive away after tucking them in every night for years upon years?

Parenting is not for the faint of heart.

So, for now I will rest easy in the knowledge that Lauren is in good care – she is safe.

And as all parenting goes, that too will change.  And I will adjust.  But that will be the hardest of transitions for this Mom. (aka now unblocked mommablogger).

PS I would recommend the following link to deal your own bloggersblock: http://www.problogger.net/battling-bloggers-block/.  One of the suggestions offered was to “Take Questions”  and I wanted to put that out to GWP readers.  Any questions about family life you might want me to address? Let me know, and we’ll start a conversation!