“Number Of Users Who Actually Enjoy Facebook Down To 4”

“In order to be profitable, it is highly likely that Twitter can only get more annoying, Pandora can only get more interrupt-y, Tumblr can only get more cluttered, Facebook can only get more devious”

“Grindr officially announces its plan to mobilize gay men as a political bloc in the 2012 elections”

“I can’t put Twitter or the little blue bird in jail, so the only way to punish is monetarily”

“About four grams of DNA theoretically could store the digital data humankind creates in one year”

“Google Glass is changing the implicit social contract with everyone in his or her field of view”

“Having opened up a chasm between the informational and material, we’re rapidly trying to close it”

“Imagine being excited to see what the Internet looks and feels like in a new town”

“remote sensing and screen culture might displace today’s commonplace demand for airbuses”

“[Academics] quickly devolve into a game of Who’s The Best Luddite. And it is most definitely about hierarchy & power”

“The site, just a few weeks old and still in beta, consists entirely of videos uploaded by real people having what might be called nonperformance-like sex”

“human beings have not always tried to make sense of emotions through numbers”

“the hate-mongers who made this video and those who use the provocation as a pretext to kill are in a symbiotic, mutually reinforcing relationship”

“it appears that identity-based search results could be nothing more than old bigotry packaged in new media” [pdf]

Follow Nathan on Twitter: @nathanjurgenson

via The Onion