The paradox: masculinity is strength, power, and dominance… but femininity is terrifying. Gender rules insist that men must avoid association with the feminine at all costs because, if they do not, they are weak. They are pussies, bitches, women, girls. Femininity is weakness and yet, oddly, it has the power to strip men of their manliness. It is as if, as sociologist Gwen Sharp once put it, “masculinity is so fragile that apparently even the slightest brush with the feminine destroys it.”
Behold the best example of this phenomenon ever:
Let’s be clear. The reason he’s afraid of femininity is because it’s reviled. It makes you a woman, which makes you worthless. Which is fine for the ladies, but dudes are advised to avoid personal denigration if at all possible.
Thanks Summer’s Eve, you make my job easy.
Lisa Wade, PhD is an Associate Professor at Tulane University. She is the author of American Hookup, a book about college sexual culture; a textbook about gender; and a forthcoming introductory text: Terrible Magnificent Sociology. You can follow her on Twitter and Instagram.
Comments 26
Rickey — March 8, 2014
Whoa, kickass helm!
Bill R — March 8, 2014
Swing and a miss on this one...
Femininity is very attractive to men, and not reviled at all. Women worthless? A foolish comment at best, obviously meant to stir the pot, but hurtful too.
Time to step up the discourse.
MG — March 8, 2014
The worst thing men say to each other is that they resemble women. Insulting women either involves shaming their body parts or judging their sexual behavior, not calling them masculine.
When little boys are allowed to be "tom girls" without judgment, I'll know we have made some headway in this area.
Ed H — March 8, 2014
I read this as mocking the male belief that masculinity is fragile. The way the woman at the end says "that was close" reads as "that was close, you gigantic, pathetic baby" to me.
It still puts the "fragile masculinity" thing on display, and demonstrates it, but it demonstrates it for the purpose of showing how ridiculous and stupid it is from a woman's point of view.
In other words, I think the commercial accurately *depicts* the comical fragility of masculinity, but I think it does so to mock it, and in doing so establish solidarity with women, who are the target market of its products. "Summer's Eve is for you, we understand you, we're like you, because we realize how ridiculous men are, especially with their fear of femininity, a quality with which our product is associated."
Sid — March 8, 2014
None of this changes the fact that women value the same brand of masculinity that men value and would rather be with a man who doesn't associate with feminity.
Hans Bakker — March 8, 2014
The ad ignores the LGTB community. Advertising is not about the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Ads do not a social science make.
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Triclosan — November 22, 2017
Women are even more fragile. That's why they are always getting raped and killed, like this: https://profilesofmurder.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/gary-ridgway.jpg