My mom once told me about how growing up I wanted a makeup kit. I had swimming lessons with a male friend of mine at the time, and his mom and my mom spent much of them talking. Apparently, at the same time, he wanted a gun. Both of us asked for these items for Christmas, and with much trepidation both of our parents eventually gave in.

We got bored with them fairly quickly and went back to legos and the like.

(This isn't data; we aren't a representative sample. I've just always liked the story.)

When is it acceptable, normal, and well-adjusted for play to include things which are currently gendered? Should makeup be banished to the 'adult' world, along with driving and cooking toys?

I am a grandmother who purchased a purse for my grandchild and found on facebook that her mother  had immediately thrown this away. Ok someone get a grip here. I have raised 2 daughters who played with army men and trucks and this didn't presuade them in the least. I find it hard to believe this article. Can we say find a better attitude ? The ones who do all of this reading on these type of articles need to get a life and let kids be kids. As far as the dress up, absolutely ridiculus. I find the mothers at home who constantly read this kind of article are impressing themselves and their ideas on their children.  I would have thought that with so much thought going into this item they would have aleast given it to a charity for a child that would have appreciated this and the garbage. Thoughtless is this article .

I think, above all, the effects of these toys depends not on whether or not they're purchased or used, but HOW so. As a girl with two older brothers, I remember playing both with Barbies and dolls and with cowboy and Star Wars Legos (typical "boy" toys). It's up to parents to remind their children that toys are toys, and that just because you pretend to be a beautician or a nurse (or a cowboy or Darth Vader) doesn't mean that's the only thing you CAN be. 

Kids in the age group that these toys are aiming at tend to play in a way that imitates the typical things they see adults doing. If you've ever been around a two-year-old for more than five minutes, there's a good chance you've suddenly found your cell phone or keys being repurposed as toys (often with hilarious/mortifying results).  The same goes for makeup; kids who see their moms putting on lipstick (not just girls) will at some point be found with their faces covered in it. A lot of parents wind up buying plastic versions of all of these things as a safer replacement for objects the kids are already trying to play with.

It would be an extreme overreach to say that the toys themselves are the instruments in socializing girls into preening. Rather, it's the adult role models that they are emulating in play, without whom they would have no interest in such toys. 

The one aspect of these items that does reinforce a gender divide is the fact that, for both the advertisers and most parents, giving them to boys is strictly out of the question. But I'm really getting sick of this strain of thought suggesting that these bits of plastic are brainwashing kids in a social vacuum. 

Humans, more than any other species, are predisposed to mentally classify and divide the world into separate categories.  (We are exploring the possibility that at its most fundamental level reality itself is binary.)  This has made it possible to manage and manipulate our environment in ways that are unthinkable for other species.

It does not require "brainwashing" for kids to want to imitate the parent (and other adults) that they most relate to by gender.

...Because infant girls are going to see a fake compact, suddenly develop the hand-eye coordination to put on eyeshadow and turn this into the one toy that isn't drooled on? Yes, we should call out the National Guard because clearly our children are being attacked.

I find it crazy how kids are being socialized to gender at increasingly young ages these days. Growing up, I did play with typical "girl" toys like barbies and an easy bake oven, but I also played with my older brother's legos and video games. I don't know if we will ever have a society where gender norms don't exist, but I hope that we can at least de-emphasize them to an extent. I think it is ridiculous that girl toddlers are already being encouraged to play with toys that stress using make-up and worrying about physical appearance. It is sad to me that the entertainment industry has become so superficial and that it has trickled itself into the larger society and our everyday lives. Toys are toys and children shouldn't feel like they are only allowed to play with certain ones because of their biological sex or feel like they will be judged if they don't follow society's norms.

A lot of the comments here seem to be suggesting that it's "natural" for little kids to want gendered toys or that kids seem to ask for them despite however liberal their parents are. But the reality is, kids are being socialized for their genders from before birth, when their mothers are receiving gendered cards and gifts. Relatives and later especially peers too reinforce gender norms and we underestimate how much of this children are learning. Unfortunately, given the society we live in, this means preschool girls are being taught that their main goal in life is to be beautiful, not smart or athletic or capable. Boys also receive limiting messages -- and are more punished for deviance from masculinity -- but at least their scripts aren't setting them up later in life for eating disorders.

But there is nothing natural about little girls specifically wanting make up kits and little boys wanting guns, anymore than pink is inherently a "girly" color (in really old days, in fact, pink, as a dilute red color, was seen as more masculine than light blue -- which was supposed to be a girly color).

Oh those look very cute, I was thinking about a gift for my nieces. Lots of great ideas ! 

The information you shared here is very informative. Many newer toy guns are brightly colored and oddly shaped to prevent them from being mistaken for real firearms.

Nice post.

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