Emma M.H. sent us a commercial for Cougar Life, a dating site that promotes itself as a place to meet older (but still sexy!) women interested in dating younger men. Despite the name, the site actually welcomes women of all ages. When you go to the website, you specify whether you’re looking for a “cub” (women aged 18-35) or a “cougar” (aged 35-65). Similarly, Emma was struck by how young the women in the ad look:
So though the company brands itself as a site about cougars — which would imply an emphasis on middle-aged and older women — here it markets itself almost entirely with women who would fall into no more than into the “cub” category or the very lowest end of 35-65 age range that defines cougars on the site, while the song declares they’re “all cougars.” It’s possible the company thought that women who look older than 40 would be unacceptable even to potential customers of a dating website specifically promising the ability to meet such women. But it also seems like the term “cougar” is being used to apply to a wider array of women than when it first entered pop culture — not just older women who date younger men, but practically any woman past her early 20s who has a voracious sexual appetite. Cougar Life draws on this, assuring us it was recently voted the “wildest dating service in America.” The defining feature may be less age than the idea that a woman is not just sexually available, but almost predatory in her search for sex — that is, that she seeks sex in a way we generally find acceptable only for men.
UPDATE: Reader Anna caught a mistake I made. The “cub” category was for the men seeking women on the site, not for younger women. She explains,
If you look at the site carefully, the “cubs” category means men the ages of 18-35, not women of these ages. Choose “looking for a cub” and the pictures are all male, and that term is often used for the younger male partner of an older women. The only women “available” on the site are 36 years old and over, so the site in effect bans both middle aged men and young-ish women from participating.
Thanks, Anna!
Comments 37
eduardo — May 27, 2011
The show Cougar Town started out as something like this, and then it just turned into a bad copy of Sex and the City. Regarding SATC, conservatives don’t want them and feminists don’t want them either (jump to 4:05).
Personally I think it’s great that older women are expressing their desires, and would’ve liked to see more age variety in that ad. Perhaps because I’ve been getting hit on by older women since college, I find the term “cougar” unnecessary (as if desires vanished after 40). I’ve always gravitated to women my own age though, but to each his own. The experience didn’t bother me :)
Zee — May 27, 2011
Apparently, cougars are all blonde, too.
Thing that I noticed though, is that the ad doesn't seem to be targeting the cougars themselves (do they get a different ad?) but presumably younger guys (DATE A COUGAR!!). Why? It seems like they're not predatory at all, unless you count simply being over a certain age and seeking sex as predatory behaviour.
anna — May 27, 2011
This post contains an error. If you look at the site carefully, the "cubs" category means men the ages of 18-35, not women of these ages. Choose "looking for a cub" and the pictures are all male, and that term is often used for the younger male partner of an older women. The only women "available" on the site are 36 years old and over, so the site in effect bans both middle aged men and young-ish women from participating.
Ady — May 27, 2011
The promise of women over 35, the image of women under 30 and a soundtrack that can't possibly be meant to represent anyone over 20. Let's not forget the audio and editing choices of this ad. Nothing sensual about jump cuts. I second Zee's comment - the female sexuality presented in this ad is frivolous, passive and objectified. Pretty much the polar opposite of what I find sexy about older women. It seems to me to be a bad marketing all around. I wonder if this is because the site's marketing is disingenuous, the site has perhaps modified their business strategy over time or never took their own target market seriously, or maybe this is just a case of failure on the side of an outside ad agency. I wonder what the company was hoping to achieve with this ad and how they responded to the final product.
m — May 27, 2011
Even keeing tha tin mind, it's striking how conventional the commercial is, with a simplistic, almost girly theme song and the women striking poses and interacting in ways that could be easily found among teenages in media. Even with the term watered down to this extent, it seems to be cougar in name only
Valerie — May 27, 2011
Wow. First of all, the song sounds like an ad for toys or fashions for preteen girls. That is disturbing.
Second, I also watched this commercial:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pw7NZ3Z49-Y
and am really grossed out by the level of objectification shown. "It's easy to date a woman like me." as if these "cougars" are all sitting on a store shelf, waiting for a buyer, and are pretty much interchangeable, as long as they fit the mold (blonde, over a certain age, look under a certain age, really like sex, only want to date younger men).
Valerie — May 27, 2011
Another thing...
I was looking at the website. The president of the company seems to be touting this as a women's empowerment thing, but the ads are targeted to the men. And the front page of the website is an ambiguously-aged woman clad in a robe, lying in a f-me come hither pose, and showing her underwear. How does any of that make the average "recently divorced, never married or just one yummy mummy" who is over the age of 35 feel empowered and like this is a place for her? Mind boggling.
syd — May 27, 2011
Look at how cheaply done this commercial is; they were likely using the first stock models/actresses they could find that didn't look like teenage girls. And even then, in the media, any woman who's supposed to be attractive, whether she be twelve or fifty, tends to be played by a woman who appears to be in the mid-20s to mid-30s range. Very few of these women are probably older than 35 (at least significantly), but the same trope happens in the opposite direction. I haven't seen more than a high schoolers played by anyone under 18 or 19 (and that's getting to be unusual as well) in a decade. Taylor Momsen, who looks older than she is and fudged her age on applications, is the only one I can think of. As a result, people interacting in real life have no idea what a teenager or a 45 year old realistically looks like.
It seems that society has decided that the epitome of beauty is a 27 year old woman with very specific features, and deviating from that standard, even if there's a specific reason to, is getting more and more impossible.
Mere — May 27, 2011
It's odd how the ads are so targeted towards men, when the main complaint I've heard about online dating sites are that the men far outnumber the women (or at least are far more active). Perhaps men are more likely to sign up in response to an ad (though the site is free, I assume they need as many customers as possible)?
This could also be like plus-size clothing sites, where the models are often far thinner than the women the shops are trying to serve. Companies often seem to show their products being used by demographics that look far different than who they're targeting (possibly since they assume women want to think of themselves as thinner/younger/etc than they actually are).
A strange marketing strategy, no matter what.
AmazingSusan — May 27, 2011
I am a so-called cougar who is 55 years young (:P).
Over the past 6 years, after leaving a 20-year-long marriage, I have dated younger men, some of them half my age. I don't have long blond hair or an insatiable sex drive. Nor do I prey on men, whatever their age. Like most stereotypes/labels, this one misses the mark because it fails to encompass the fullness of diversity.
I've blogged previously on the issue in a piece entitled Cougars: Are we Predators? Or just playful pussycats? (http://www.amazingwomenrock.com/myblog/cougars-are-we-predators-or-just-playful-pussycats.html)
Thanks for the interesting post and comments. I'm pleased to have stumbled on your blog :)
Mme — May 28, 2011
oh my this ad is hilarious, it sounds like a barbie advertisement or the opening of a disney series, really catchy. "datacougadatacouga!"
Eagle — June 2, 2011
that was one of the funniest ads i've ever seen in my entire life. that guy on the computer looked like such a creeper, no wait, like the target audience for that ad. the little cougar roars and obnoxious music repeating "date a cougar" was just hysterical. and yes, it's ridiculous how young those women look. and what was up with that scene from Ugly americans at the end? that part added a whole twist of WTF to this already messed up cocktail
Iamsusam88 — July 8, 2011
I love cougar
Milf — July 24, 2011
Great post i think i remember this?? Cougars are amazing i love them. This is quite a pretty cool site.
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